This Ain’t Glee XXX

I’m a fan of the TV show Glee

Yep, they sucked me in and I have a Season Pass, so I understand the show and the characters and the story lines. There was a lot of hype online about this porn because it’s different in that he porn stars are actually singing. There were all kinds of links to porn star audition videos when they were casting for it.  When Hustler sent me this for review, I was quite excited.

What to Expect

Lots of sex, 5 sex scenes in total! Each sex scene ranges anywhere from 12 minutes to 20 minutes long. There’s a storyline, actually a couple from the show’s 1^st season in this movie and they stay true to the real plot and to the characters. I also give them credit, with sex scenes being so long and dominant, the storyline is still strong and can still be followed and still comes to a resolution at the end.

Fetishes Galore

If you’re into the schoolgirl/cheerleader fetish and sex with teachers and coaches and cheerleaders and naughty schoolgirls in the bathroom, in the classroom, in the teachers’ lounge, then this movie is for you. There’s lesbian sex, hetero-sex, lesbian strap-on sex, some dominance and submission, lots of oral sex, lots of vaginal sex, toys and vibrators. There’s no anal intercourse, just one scene in which a vibrator is used as a butt plug, but no penis in anus action here. I’m not saying that’s a bad thing, it just is what it is.

Is the singing any good?

That was the question I had going into this because if the singing sucked and there was a lot of it, the flick would be ruined. I’m happy to report that I enjoyed the songs. Not just the stars voices singing, but the lyrics are damn clever and funny too. They basically took the tunes of popular songs and changed the lyrics to some very naughty things. The songs are quite catchy too, especially the first one.

Favorite Scene

Hands down the first scene with Nikki Hunter playing Sue and Miko Sinz as Tina is the best, naughtiest scene in This Ain’t Glee XXX. It starts about 8 minutes into the movie and takes place in the girls bathroom/locker room. I learned in the Behind the Scenes that Nikki doesn’t watch Glee regularly, but she watched a bunch of episodes for the role and I think she nailed Sue perfectly. She took on this dominant role and basically molested and blackmailed Tina into having sex with her. It was real dirty and filthy and I loved it. Sue bangs Tina with a very large black strap-on and from what I learned in the BTS, Miko has not taken anything so big in her life ever. Miko did a fine job.

Sue had Tina sucking on her big black cock while talking dirty and ordering Tina around. I normally don’t find a lot of sucking on a strap-on to be that exciting, however, Sue’s running commentary of dirty talk kept my panties wet. They have sex on the bench in the locker room and finish up with some reverse cowgirl on the toilet in one of the stalls. Nikki Hunter absolutely made that scene the total hotness that is and the scene lasted 20 minutes! I had to check the timer on my DVD player because I couldn’t believe a scene so good was that long. Nikki really kept things moving along and freakin hot! With an opening scene that hot and filthy, I couldn’t wait to see what else was in store.

2^nd Best Sex Scene

The 4^th scene with Tara Lynn Foxx playing Quinn and Tucker Slaine as Finn tickled my fancy. The scene opened with a song containing some more clever lyrics. Then they got it on in the nurse’s office. Quinn started the scene with her cheerleader costume on, then stripped off everything except her skirt, ankle socks and sneakers which I found to be really hot. While Tara gives us a little bit of dirty talking which I always appreciate, it wasn’t just the talking or the sexual activities that made this scene hot, it was the great chemistry between the two of them. The sex lasts a good 12 minutes and comes just in time because the sex scene before it was…

The Worst Sex Scene

Sex Scene #3 with Scarlett Fay as Emma and Chad Diamond as Will, along with Andy San Dimas in the background as Rachel started out pretty hot. There seemed to be some good chemistry between Scarlett and Chad as they were making out and getting each other stripped down. Andy is watching them masturbating in the background and she wasn’t over the top, so there seemed to be a genuine enjoyment there which gets me off. Even the oral was pretty hot. It was a quieter scene, neither of them talked too much, there was a lot of breathing and that worked for me…for a little while. Once they started having intercourse, something changed. The chemistry was gone and it was like they were just going through the motions. I sat there thinking, if the actual characters of Emma and Will had sex, it wouldn’t be wild and crazy, so neither were the actors portraying them. However, this doesn’t really make for exciting porn so we shouldn’t be spending almost 20 minutes with them. I desperately wanted to fast forward, but I hung in there til the end. Andy helped the scene along a little bit with her background, voyeurism masturbation. Unfortunately, once the chemistry vanished the scene just crawled along for me.

Threesome Ho-Hum

The 2^nd sex scene is a threesome with 2 cheerleaders played by sexy blonde McKenzee Miles and luscious dark haired Alexa Nicole getting it on with Puck played by John Espizedo.  Two cheerleaders seducing a fellow student in the glee club classroom should be pretty hot and I really expected it to be coming right after the Sue/Tina scene. The beginning is pretty hot with all the dirty talking and seducing that McKenzee and Alexa do together. To me, a good threesome scene has everybody involved with each other. So when the girls are also into each other, it makes the scene hotter and allows everyone to stay involved. I was swindled into thinking that Alexa and McKenzee were actually into each other by the duo seduction of Puck.

Once the sex really got started, they both basically concentrated on him. In the TV show, it’s pretty clear that they’re both bi-sexual and into each other. However, that’s not how the ladies played it out here and I think it hurt the scene. Sure the duo blow job is hot and the ladies kissed each other a little bit when Puck was fucking each of them, but the titty play and nipple licking was a dead giveaway that at least McKenzee is not really into the ladies. I’d say Alexa felt a little more genuine in the scene. It all started to go wrong when McKenzee, in watching Puck fuck Alexa, really started playing for the camera. Her moans and gestures were feeling a bit too overdone. She also kept sucking on her pom pom vibrator. I felt like for a scene that lasted 24 minutes, she was running out of things to do in this threesome and there was so much more that could have happened that would have made the scene hotter. I love it when there’s Lady, Lady, Man threesomes in a movie, but this one was standard and disappointing, especially after how hot the Sue/Tina scene got me.

Pom Pom Vibrators are Fun

The above mentioned cheerleader scene featured Hustler’s Pom Pom Vibrator. I just received one for review and it is a hoot. It was also a great addition to the scene, when the girls were using them.

Did the last scene save the movie for me?

The 5^th and last sex scene starred Andy San Dimas as Rachel and Chad Diamond as Will. This is the big scene at the end. They opened strong, could they close strong too? In short, it didn’t play out well for me. When we saw Rachel and Finn getting it on in the TV show, Rachel was unsure and submissive. In this scene Andy plays her as more aggressive, dominant and a “performer”. I think the confident Rachel is the way to go too since this is ultimately a porn flick. Unfortunately, there were moments where Andy was too over the top that it began to feel fake.

The editing in this scene was also questionable. There’s a moment where Andy’s laying on the desk while Chad is fucking her and she’s moaning and groaning in ecstasy while she’s obviously picking something out of her pubic hair. She does it several times. I thought, “That looks weird, why didn’t they edit that out?” There’s another moment where Andy is making all kinds of noise and talking and her mouth isn’t even moving, like it was dubbed over incorrectly… Disappointing.

Speaking of editing, it seemed funny at first

Towards the end of the cheerleader/Puck threesome, you can actually hear somebody, maybe the director, give directions in the background. It seemed almost as if it was something that should have been taken out and was missed.

Extras

The only worthwhile extra is the Behind the Scenes. This was actually quite enjoyable because each actress actually tells interesting stories. Usually it’s just a bunch of crap and the actress doesn’t know what to say and she looks really uncomfortable, but not here. Each actress was very personable and interesting to listen to. I learned some stuff about them, about their part in the movie and I like to learn stuff.

The only thing I was hoping to be on there were the auditions, that would have been fun to see. Not everybody saw the videos posted online and that would have also been a treat to even see the stars sing their songs for the movie. Oh well.

Overall Thoughts

This Ain’t Glee XXX has received some serious hype because it’s a different kind of porn in that it’s a musical with the actual cast singing the songs. I’m sure there will be some AVN nominations for them because of the difference. Being a fan of Glee, I thought this was a great idea and had high hopes for a hot and filthy movie starring cheerleaders and schoolgirls getting it on with a little bit of song too.

The movie started out strong with the Sue/Tina scene…maybe too strong. The bar was set really high for the rest of the movie and while there was one other scene that made me wet, overall I wasn’t that excited by this movie. I think most of the sex scenes could have been shortened which would have tightened them up and probably would have made them hotter. The songs are great, clever lyrics, they get stuck in your head. The singing is impressive, much better than I thought it would be; even the acting in the non-sex scenes was really good. Even though most of the cast hasn’t seen the show except for the research they did for their parts, they kept to the characters. It’s just unfortunate that the most of the scenes wound up being standard and just too long.

So with this porn being so disappointing to me, do I think you should see it? Glee is big right now, and if you’re a fan, I think you’d get a kick out of seeing it. It’s not available for online rental now, I do recommend at least renting it. The DVD is currently $22.29 which isn’t bad for purchasing. I don’t think it’s worth the $34.99 Blu-Ray price though.

While this movie was disappointing, I’m a big fan of Glee and I’m glad I had the chance to see it. Will I watch it again, probably not.

• Starring: Nikki Hunter, McKenzee Miles, Miko Sinz, Andy San Dimas, Samone Taylor, Tara Lynn Foxx, Scarlett Fay, Alexa Nicole, Chad Diamond, John Espizedo, Tucker Slaine and James Bartholet
• Director: Axel Braun
• Run Time: 1 hour and 51 minutes
• Extras: Behind the Scenes, Slideshow, Trailers

Where It's Available:

• Order This Ain’t Glee XXX from Intimate Source
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